Meet Manuela Borni, a humanitarian who works with refugee and asylum-seeking women

On the occasion of 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence (GBV), we spoke to our colleague Manuela Borni, who works with refugee and asylum-seeking women as a Psychosocial Support Officer at the Cyprus Refugee Council (CyRC). She shed light on the multiple issues faced by refugee and asylum-seeking women arriving in Cyprus from different parts of the world, and their precarious situations once they enter the asylum system. She also shared her hopes and wishes, not only for the women she works with, but for healthy societies where everyone benefits.

Manuela, tell us about yourself.

I am from Genova in northern Italy. Growing up I was just an Italian child who spoke only one language. But living in a harbour city and seeing diversity all around me, I always had a strong feeling about ‘the other’ being a source of richness. I studied Psychology and Migration Studies and now I speak five languages: Italian, English, French, Spanish and Greek. I have been in Cyprus for six years, working with the migrant, refugee and asylum-seeking population, and for the last nine months with the Cyprus Refugee Council supporting women in the asylum system. I am a realist, I see the problems in the world. But I also see the potential of how things can be and I’m attached to this potential. This is what drives me.

In the context of 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence (GBV), and your work with refugee and asylum-seeking women in Cyprus, what types of GBV do you come across?

I see so many women from different countries, including Cameroon, Democratic Republic of the Congo, Guinea, Sierra Leone, Somalia and Syria. The types of GBV that these women have experienced are many, and in most cases, each woman has experienced more than one form of GBV. I see the trauma of these women on three levels. Level 1 is about what they have experienced, even as girls, in their home countries – for example, Female Genital Mutilation (FGM), forced marriages, abuse within their extended families, rape, having children from young ages and often having to leave children behind when they flee. The second level is about the journeys that these women take and how they get here. I see many cases of trafficked women who thought they were escaping violence in their home country, and then face further GBV during their journeys, and once they arrive here. Level 3 is what they experience once they are in the asylum system. Due to various shortcomings, the system creates precariousness and these already traumatized women are further exposed to more GBV, for example exploitation by their employers or others, or the risks of becoming homeless. Something also that we have to consider is that many women have left children behind in their home countries. They love their families but are not there to care for them and missing important moments in their children’s lives. This “ambiguous loss” is an additional source of psychological distress, and there are often complicated relationships with the caregivers of their children.

Are there any cases/stories that stand out for you in particular and why?

Every woman’s life and story are unique. And each of the women I meet are special in their own way. I feel so privileged to be in touch with so many people. Everyday I’m learning so much. If only they knew how much they’re giving to me. If I have to think of one story, it would be my first ever one-to-one meeting with a woman who was a survivor of trafficking. I remember that she was very traumatized, but when I met her, she was already finding some coping mechanisms. I remember that feeling of connecting with her and acknowledging how, little by little, she was able to build back her sense of self, and the pieces of her life. The last time I saw her, she was doing a lot better through the support she was receiving.

Can you tell us why you think raising awareness on GBV among refugee and asylum-seeking women, but also among the wider public is important?

Gender-based violence (GBV) is everywhere in the world, including here in Cyprus, and not just among refugee and asylum-seeking women. But GBV takes different forms in different cultural contexts. There is a statistic from the WHO that says that 1 in 4 young women in the world (aged 15-24 years) who have been in a relationship will have already experienced violence by an intimate partner by the time they reach their mid-twenties. Raising awareness about GBV is extremely important because it is a common struggle for all women and so it unites us. Most probably the types of GBV are not the same – for us westerners it’s impossible to imagine FGM for example, or forced marriage, but for sure GBV is happening in every society in different forms.

Raising awareness will help people to recognise GBV better, to know all the types, to know what they can do about it and to raise their voice when they see it happening to others. Raising awareness will make GBV more visible to the society and help remove the shame and taboo of the survivor. It will also help perpetrators to become more aware as well, because sometimes GBV is considered “normal” behaviour.

What are the issues that refugee and asylum-seeking women who have experienced GBV are facing once they arrive in Cyprus, and enter the asylum system? How could these be improved?

Unfortunately the system is fragmented, and so this leaves many gaps. People are more and more in the situation of not being able to cover their basic needs (food, housing and health) and so they lack stability. Sometimes, even if there are resources, it is difficult to access them. An example is access to health and mental health services: such services are high quality and provided for free to asylum seekers, but language, cultural or economic barriers could prevent their access. For example, very often people miss important medical appointments simply because they cannot cover the cost of their transportation. I really believe that a key to improving the system would be to have intercultural mediators as recognized professionals present in government offices and hospitals. Intercultural mediation is a profession; it is not something you can improvise. Many people come with the qualifications, the languages and the cultural understanding needed – these skillsets could be integrated and made official with a diploma, and publicly recognized. In general, and seeing how multicultural Cypriot society is, I believe that investing in such efforts would definitely benefit the entire society. Systematic language lessons for asylum-seekers and refugees are a must. And in general the services should help people to live self-sufficiently, not be dependent on social welfare. A better social welfare system is better for everybody. We all want to live in a healthy society. There must be more possibilities to access the labour market. Most of the people I meet come with all kinds of qualifications and they all want to work. They may have university degrees in economics, computer science, nursing and social work, for example. It’s very important to validate skills – even those women without formal education have so much to offer in terms of community work and I meet so many artistic women. Lastly, I would add that what I feel we also need is community recognition – that we acknowledge that we are are all here in this community together. We should have more social spaces that are accessible community spaces not just for migrants and refugees, but for us all to come together. It’s time for all of us to overcome our barriers. As long as we see ‘the other’ as the other, then the most we might be able to do is feel sorry or perhaps empathise. But we must be able to elevate ourselves to the next level. We are all part of the same world.

What are the psychological and social impacts on a woman’s or a girl’s life following an experience of GBV? How is this different for refugee and asylum-seeking women?

In my daily work I see first-hand how such kinds of violence could have very important consequences at every level: bio-psycho-social. I have met a number of people whose life is impacted for example by symptoms such as flashbacks, sleeping difficulties, recurrent thoughts and/or by mixed feelings of guilt and/or shame combined with low self-esteem. I meet persons who experience depression, isolation and/or problems in relationships. Help and support should be both at the individual and societal level. We have also to remember that there can be also life-long physical consequences, for example following experiences of FGM, together with the fact that traumatic experiences are not limited to GBV; in the case of asylum-seekers and refugees, many people have also been directly exposed to conflicts and other forms of violence as well.

How does your work at the Cyprus Refugee Council (CyRC) help these women and girls?

At CyRC we have a multidisciplinary team supporting individual asylum-seekers and refugees, while also networking with other organisations. I work as a Psychosocial Support Officer together with colleagues who are Social Advisors, Legal Advisors, Psychologists, Cultural Mediators, Integration Advisors and Translators. We are working together to provide individual support while also trying to give each person the possibility to perceive that they are supported; this activates the awareness within a person of the possibilities available to her and to be able to make a plan to rebuild her life. Support is given in a way that encourages the person to take part in every decision and every step in the plan. Making a plan requires a person to first realise what she already has, and what she can build on. The care plan is not just ‘mechanics’ – for example we help to check why benefits aren’t being received; we set up appointments such as with the psychologist or psychiatrist. We advocate for access to rights. We are trying to rebuild trust and hope. What I say to the women I work with is that I am not the expert here. I tell them, “You are the expert about your own life. Your expertise is crucial. You are the manager of your life and you’re coming to us so we advise about different services so that you can decide what you need for yourself.”

For anyone reading this and wishing to offer support, what could you suggest?

The first thing I would suggest is: be open. Go out and meet the people themselves. Find out what they really need rather than go with an idea of what you think they need. I think community recognition is needed – the idea that we are all here in this community together. Social spaces that are accessible community spaces – and not just for refugees, asylum-seekers and migrants are very important. It’s time for all of us to overcome our barriers.

For anyone experiencing GBV, what would you advise?

If a person feels that s/he is affected by experiences of GBV, s/he should seek help: it is possible to be helped.

What are some of the ways that women could become more empowered and less vulnerable, in particular as asylum-seekers and refugees in Cyprus?

It is important for women to realise they have choices, and to be better informed about what those choices are. It is important for these women, in particular survivors of GBV, to face their individual traumatic experiences and be able to create supportive environments for themselves in their own social networks. What they perceive as being possible is key. Lack of information and lack of resources support the perception of a vulnerable person that there isn’t any help available. At CyRC we try to transform this perception in our multidisciplinary approach.

If you could have three wishes for how to improve the lives of refugee and asylum-seeking women in Cyprus, in particular survivors of GBV, what would they be?

First of all, that they are heard and they are involved in the decision-making and be actively involved in analysing their needs and building solutions together with societal actors. I wish for each woman who is a survivor of GBV to be able to overcome her trauma and rebuild her life. I also wish for togetherness in building resilience, healing traumas and rebuilding lives. I wish here in Cyprus we could build more community spaces where we could meet each other, be more open all together and build a new community that is based on diversity. Cyprus is an amazing place, and it could really be an example for the world; because it is a small place, this means that small actions can have even more impact.

“I feel so privileged to be in touch with so many people and their individual universe. Everyday I’m learning so much. If only the people knew how much they’re giving to me. They are all superwomen. I would like somehow that they could know this. What I wish for them is to find a place where they can continue with their life journey, to remove some stones they have in their backpacks to make space for new experiences.”

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